you do not have to be good

Wild Geese

You do not have to be good.

You do not have to walk on your knees

for a hundred miles through the desert repenting.

You only have to let the soft animal of your body

love what it loves.

Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.

Meanwhile the world goes on.

Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain

are moving across the landscapes, 

over the prairies and the deep trees,

the mountains and the rivers.

Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,

are heading home again.

Whoever you are, no matter how lonely, 

the world offers itself to your imagination,

calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting  

over and over announcing your place 

in the family of things.

~Mary Oliver

There are so many lovely, sacred things about this poem but today the first line stops me in my tracks.

You do not have to be good.

I'm pretty sure I've missed out on some wonderful things for fear I wouldn't be good or good enough.  I've measured success or value or even beauty by how it is received, how many comments I am getting, or by reading the looks on people's faces.  And by these measures, I'm never, ever good enough.  

I tell my girls again and again to make mistakes (that's how we learn!), to keep trying and creating (it's how we grow!), to let go of responses or any sort of comparing/measuring (those things kill creativity and pretty much everything good in life!) that their art, poem, music, friendships and conversations - their very selves - are beautiful because of the imperfect parts.  Just the act of creating, simply the showing up and attempting to do something unique and wonder-full is enough.  My daughters, you do not have to be good.  

For the love.  It's about time I start believing it.

My dear friend shared a story in front of her church on Sunday.  She cried her way through and her words (not perfect but so very eloquent) combined with her tears were her unique and creative contribution to this messy, broken world.  She fights hard to remember her place in the family of things - what a gift to witness the beauty of a such a woman.  I don't know what the faces staring back at her looked like.  I know she received a couple of encouraging responses.  I am sure there was a mixed response to the story and depth of emotion...there always, always is.  

But she did not have to be good.  She did have to courageously show up and tell a story in only the way she could tell it.  That was her gift.  Show up, do your work, tell your story, and remember you do not have to be good.  I know it's not easy, these things never are.  Simply love what you love and do what only you can do - the world calls to you (like wild geese!) with all its beauty and brokenness to join in.